like i need it

i have entertained, more often lately, the idea of using tina. i had gone to tweaker.org and been reading about it. i have to say as i was reading i was thinking: i hardly need this because i have most of the effects (though i am certain not to the extremes that the drug provides) on my own.

"You spend 3 hours walking around walmart, and all you end up buying is some duct tape and q-tips." was the quote that hit home the most. I can do that now, well maybe not 3 hours but a good hour can be spent if i'm really squirrelly. and of course the general idea of sexual abandon kind of applies to me as well. i went to a party last week and a guy was surprised i wasn't partying and only had a couple of drinks. he was surprised because i was fun to be with sexually and very open (yes writing this does bring a self satisfied smile to my face) and i guess he felt most needed to party for this. the feeling of paranoia also is not completely foreign to me but before my many readers cross me off their lists i have to say that it is kept mostly if not completely in check (but the idea is there).